The Ides Of March – Justice for Trayvon Martin
Things have been very stressful for me lately. So much that I felt like riding my cannondale to Narita airport and taking off on the next plane to the U.S. I’ve been equally disturbed by the shooting of Trayvon Martin. Like so many other people I want justice. I’m equally angered by black on black crime. So many people protest about the police but they are not protesting about other things that many of them can change right in their communities.
Politics in the U.S. has become visceral. Whenever there is an economic crisis fascism appears. There is a movement headed by the Koch brothers to usurp power in the U.S. with ready-made conservative legislation (http://www.thenation.com/article/161973/koch-connection).It’s not only in the U.S. but all over the world. People need to wake up and understand what is happening because it is this type of movement which ultimately led to gun laws that protect Trayvon Martin’s murderer.
Many of us want jobs to support ourselves but the reality is that many corporation have sold us out for big profits. We love Steve Jobs and his legacy but Apple product are made in China. Even his widow made this clear to President Obama when they met after Jobs died. Some of the jobs we want are not coming back. They are gone. Some of this is due to technology. Some of it is due to greed. Probably most of it is due to greed.
So, yeah I want to go home but to what? To streets filled with violence and want or to people united for change. I’m a father and a teacher. We can’t have both ways sometimes. People like sports but what is really going on? That’s what you have to ask yourself. Trayvon Martin needs justice and the world needs justice. The world also needs tolerance and understanding. There is too much at stake. Any little things we do each day can go a long way towards helping to make the world a better place. It sounds corny but it works. You never know, it might be you out there one night or even in the day time and someone may profile you and decide to pull the trigger.
Bang!
Exile
I look out the window of the commuter train and I wonder what I’m doing here. Did I make some kind of mistake
or is for the reasons I told myself or convinced myself.?
Part of the plan has succeeded. I’m with my family. I’m working now but a part of me resists becoming part of the Borg. I don’t want too. I keep looking out of the window everyday as if it might one day change and become something different. I listen to my iPod. I try to delve deeper into a book. People look at me, brisk past me, nudge me to get wherever it is they are trying to get to but for some reason they can never move fast enough to reach their destination in time.
Where are they going?
I’m still staring out the window. I’m listing to samples from music, rock, rap or soul. It doesn’t matter. Sometimes I imagine myself moving backwards amongst the throngs of people the way some artists do in music videos but I not famous enough to pull that off. Where is my connection. The chidden give me hope. They are happy and optimistic everyday and quickly forget any painful experience and live for new things good and bad.
The train. My job. Sitting at my desk. Drinking green tea. A drawer broke. I brought it downstairs and the maintenance men came and fixed it right-away. The office lady who offered me chocolates for Valentines day and I declined. I don’t like chocolate candies. I don’t mind cocoa. The administrators who though appear aloof are watching carefully the going about at the office. I drift on.
Now everyone has come down with influenza. When will enough be enough. Nothing is perfect. It’s hard to talk to people. I withdraw 200 Yen from the bank to pay for my bicycle garage fees.
I just keep looking out of the window. 
Home
I’ve been thinking about going home this summer. Actually I was going to stay in Japan but it’s hard to stay here for so long. This year will be crazy for me because I will be teaching Junior High. It’s my first time in Japan.
I’m on winter break and I have to teach for one weak in January. Today was my first day. It was weird. I was a little annoyed with one class but what do you expect with seniors. I like some of my students but it’s a rich-boy private school and so some of the kids are a bit shallow. The worst part though is that here in Japan student are not shy speaking to their friends in class but they are shy in responding to the teacher. I’m use to more social interaction. Last year was so rough and tough. I just felt like jumping through a window like Wolverine but I’m no X Man. Anyway I survived. My commute is crazy too. I can’t count how many books I’ve read on the subway and also my iPod is now a part of my head.
The bright side is that I did connect with some students and that was cool. You can win every game. I know a lot of people here in Japan but I don’t really hang out much. I do spend a lot of time in record stores and I did make one friend in a record store who is a DJ and was surprised at how much music I bought and what it was. It was a enough of a shock to him to strike up a conversation. I may get a DJ gig but here in Japan things can take so long. I’m in no rush. I like playing around at home and I’ve done some production but I have to take things to another level and I’m getting closer and closer.
$$$
I’m still here
! As usual I miss home. Time to move forward. I’m making new friends and there are new adventures. This is turning out to be a lot longer than I expected. Who knows what is next but it can’t be any worse than what I have experienced before. Actually that sounds to pessimistic. I feel good. Sometimes things look so good from afar. I can see things a lot differently. Still something is missing. My family keeps my spirits up. Sometimes I spend hours in the crates looking at vinyl. I can’t really communicate with people so, I can only listen and observe. I’m making an effort to learn the language but it’s moving so slow. I’ve never been one to be too quiet but what can I do?
I have to put my bags down and move one.
New Years was quiet.
I’m amazed at how people here were crosses for fashion and celebrate U.S. holidays but it’s all products and services. The cigarette smoking gets annoying but I’ve never been some place where there is so much social engineering but people here feel safe. After a few days off it’s back to work for most people but not me. I have to keep my mind free but I actually have to start teaching soon.
Home
I feel like going home.
Some people as you might already know have already left. Some are leaving quietly. Honestly, a lot of people are in Japan to make money. Despite the earthquake and nuclear meltdown, there is money to be made. Health care here is good and people save their money. A lot of young people here can’t get jobs though because many companies don’t want to hire anyone full-time, because that means health benefits, retirement checks and bonuses.
What would I be going home to?I’m not sure yet. There is so much angst at home but it could be worse. I mean I would’t be in a war zone. I can’t really complain. I just sort of feel like I’m in limbo. Popular culture seems to be dead or am I stuck in the 80′s?
I’m looking for the perfect beat.
I need to get my children out of the city here because it’s not healthy. I want more space, social freedom and diversity. I have to make the most of it because well, every place has its pros and cons.
I live my job and I work with some cool people but I need more. I don’t like the private school system here. Working at a university is a coveted job here but people rarely give up those types of jobs. I want to be patient but I don’t know how much longer I’ll last. Now I’m just saving my cash until I can make my move. After the earthquake it just felt like a lot of people I knew just retreated back into their comfort zones. we were all contemplating what was safe. Now we have gone back to our routines. Facebook can’t save us and neither can Apple products. Deonstrate by Dj Ulipian
Hater Juice
It was good to get away from Japan for a while. It’s my home now and I’m basically an immigrant but home was home. On this vacation I felt like I was seeing everyone I needed to see. There was always more but sometimes there is reality.
Family and friends can make you feel whole and give meaning to life each day. Swimming in the ocean provided some needed rejuvenation. I usually swim when I am at the beach but since the meltdown of the reactors and releasing of millions of gallons of radioactive water into the ocean off the coast of Japan, I haven’t returned to the sea. At some point maybe I will. Now there was the contaminated meat that was processed and sold as well as rice. Hopefully the government can stay committed to the task of monitoring the the fallout from the reactors as all of that nasty stuff works its way into the environment.
What about the children? How will they be impacted? There are so many questions. I give my self two to three years max and then I would like to return home to the U.S. In the U.S. people are not fairing much better. Coming home is a great idea but to what? Will I be able to find a job? I don’t know. Still it feels good to have a plan and to follow it even if plans change.
Now I’m on vacation and making the most of every minute and I feel good. We are getting down to our final days. There has been ups and downs but overall I have no regrets. It has been good for all of us. I feel really good about this trip.
There are always things that you want to change but as a friend told me today, “be who you are not what others want you to be!
The Takers
I’ll miss Gil Scott Heron.
He was right on the money. It’s funny how people will just copy your ideas and then talk about themselves because they need attention. Or how they will down play your talent and only when it is necessary they will flatter you to make them selves look good.
Sometimes I’m silent when this happens. I like to see them smile and bewilder me with their lies. It’s ok because I know the truth. It’s also funny how people who are insecure can have such big ego’s. You would never know that they are insecure. It’s like they only play games they are good at so they never lose their egos.
I’m being poetic. I’ve been listening to Gil Scott Heron. I guess this too will educate someone who will turn around and say,” Do you know who Gil Scott Heron was?” And I was the one who told them who he was.
There is so much more to say. Now I’m in exile. Really that is what being in Japan is like for me. The crazy thing about it all is that it was a dream I had long ago to come here. Now I’m here. Self actualization. In the not too distant future I will wander back to America.
I’ll be ok. It won’t be long. Everything happens for a reason, no time is wasted.
Life
Yokohama
I’m still here.
It’s not easy living in Japan. Socially it is complicated because I think that Japanese people are good at cooperation, as was seen with the recent earthquake but they are bad at communication. This is from a foreigners perspective because from the outside looking in, communication appears to be about non-verbal communication. I mean service in Japan is top-notch because of the lack of social skills that people have developed. I feel that the great service that you see in Japanese society is a compensation for the brusqueness of the people. It’s baffling to me but what do I know? I’m an immigrant.
I have to learn the rules but what I see are people who live frantic lives scrambling to scratch the surface of society. I don’t think Japan is a democracy, it’s a massive bureaucracy controlled by wealthy and connected bureaucrats that benefit from the largess of Japanese society.
A perfect example of this is TEPCO.
Japan is beautiful. It’s an affluent society and so that is why I see the silence in the face of extreme odds in Japan.
People here feel safe so they don’t complain.
Earthquake
We are fine. I was riding my bike when it happened. I was listening to Digable Planets. I felt like I wasn’t going anywhere. Then I heard the large Orwellian loud speakers spread throughout Japan and I looked up an saw the power line shaking and then I knew it was the Big ONe! I took cover in a parking lot area near Denny’s like restaurant. When things sort of returned to normal I rode my bike home as fast as I could watching out that power lines didn’t fall on me. None did!
I got home and secured all my belongings. My wife wasn’t home, she was with the kids and her grandfather at my sons preschool. They returned an hour later and we were relieved. Now it’s just aftershock, after aftershock and well there is always the nuclear reactor that could explode.
Earthquake
Jump to the beat
I’ve been teaching like crazy!
Now the school is taking off. Most of my students are very young like two years-old! Am I teaching or just playing Ronald McDonald?
It remains to be seen. They all seem to be enjoying it. I’m glad I stayed the course. In the beginning there were arguments and worse, as to what we should do, now it’s all about how much sleep we can get. Later I’ll be teaching my high school classes as well as trying to maintain the store. Well, I’m use to multi-tasking, welcome to Japan.!
I’ve asked a friend and fellow teacher to help contribute to school, of course he will be able to make money as well. He’s also busy and has a child on the way.
I like what I’m doing. If I could only get the phone to work. Where is my wife? Well, she is juggling a lot too. 